An Untraditional Mom

I am not the traditional mom in size or personality; I am divorced, short, with a small foot, and chose not to remarry but instead to focus on my kids and family. I remain committed to church, and chose a career that allows me to have flexibility- but not a lot of money. I let my kids sleep in my bed when they became afraid, or it stormed, unlike many of my friends I did not feel this would cause a negative impact on the girls. Vacations revolved around the girls sports and my parents. Now they are teenagers, and both have become good students focused on college and growing spritually. Teens can be a challenge financially and mentally. I have learned to be tough and that it is ok to think outside the box.

I have found that I had to become comfortable being alone along the way; by choice. I can eat at restaurants alone; I am ok being the third wheel when couple friends invite me out for hte evening. We did not have cable TV nor did I supply the girls with any video games. We did not own any video game equipment- Well I did buy a karoake machine. I made a conscious  choice to keep the girls active and their minds cleared from technoology that I feared would deplete creativity. Now after 14 years as a single mom I feel that I am ready to find a partner for ME, The girls will always know that Parenting/Family came first and dating comes second. Being a single mom is an acceptable choice; do not fall into the trap of feeling inadequate on your own.

I wear a size 5 shoe, and sometimes I need 4 1/2. Sounds simple. But it is not. The salespeople look at me, and move on. They do not even try to find my sizes anymore. I shopped at upscale stores, and often found shoes in my younger years. Not so anymore. In spring they had fives- Now They have eliminated the space where fives belong.
The Internet may be my only life line. I have ordered on the net more than once, but I like to try the brand out in a department store first. Even if they have one size up- so that I can find out if the sole is comfy.

I am jealous of women with closets of shoes- that fit perfectly, they look forward to summer because their collection is better seen in short skirts or capris, not so for me. I look forward to spring - because I get by with a wrong size- flip flops never have to fit just right.

My kids and I do not fit the traditional clothing molds. One is tall and thin- wearing size 2 long jeans. The other- size 0 short length jeans. At least they both can wear "normal shoes". It was a happy day when my oldest grew into a size 6 shoe then a 7, now 7 1/2. My youngest- a respectable 5 1/2 or 6 shoe size.

I just want other moms to know- If divorce affects your family- it is ok to go it alone- You do not need a man to make your life whole. FInd a partner when he can be a priority but your children  understand their improtance as well.